Relationships are hard. If you have a relationship and it’s easy, that means that you don’t have much invested in each other. I think Holly’s youth minister used to ask couples (us) when they’re thinking about getting married if they’ve had their first big fight yet.
This is kind of a yard-stick for a relationship, don’t you think? If you don’t have much invested, or you just don’t care that much, wouldn’t a big blow-up fight just end the relationship? Why bother with it?
However, a big blow-up and working through it and maintaining relationship through it will probably end up stronger.
Holly and I aren’t fighting, by the way. 🙂
But, at what point do you throw in the towel with a friendship? Is there a point where you realize, “You and I see life very differently. Your point of view continually frustrates me and vice-versa. We’ve dealt with conflict, but you’re still you and I’m still me and neither of us can change who we are to make this relationship better. For that matter, our relationship isn’t making either of us better people. I wish you hope, love and peace. Go with God.”…?
Or does letting things get to that point mean that something or somebody has been screwing up? I have little patience for passive/aggressive behavior. I work hard to try to keep it out of my own behavior. So, when direct confrontation starts to seem useless, I can bottle with the best of’em. I’m not sure which is worse.